"68 sleeps to go". Now see, it doesn't sound so scary when I say it like that. However when I say "10 weeks to go" I feel my head starting to get a little faint.
Everyone keeps saying "You're so organised!" but I certainly wasn't feeling like that last week.
Work has been SO busy. As in I went for several weekends in a row without having a proper relaxing 2 day weekend. I'm a 30 something now - if I don't have a proper weekend it kills me! I work in the music industry and summer is crunch time - it's summer touring festival CRAZY! I have bands coming out of my ears, I'm so tanned from having to hang out at all these festivals waiting to supervise interviews and whatnot. I mean, I realise there are much tougher jobs out there but I've been so tired I've been delirious. You know that feeling of exhaustion where you think your head is going to EXPLODE if required to process or take in any more information? That's been me.
Not really the kind of head space that allows one to be able to breeeeeeeathe and think about what wedding things still need to be done.
I had a feeling it was going to come down to this as we approached the landing. Which is why we were so organised over 12 months ago, locking in all the big decisions early before having a bit of time to relax.
We had to really. At least two thirds of our guests are coming from interstate, and a handful of friends coming back from abroad just for us! The very least we can do, in asking them to travel all this way, is make it as easy as possible for them I figure.
But now we're coming to the pointy end of the stick. I've been tired, I've been stressed and of course... it's made me be a bit emotional.
I was determined to be super organised from the beginning and to spread out the "work" so I wouldn't become the dreaded cliche Bridezilla. And I don't think I have become one. But I have had moments of bursting into tears two weekends in a row. They erupted unexpectedly!
First time was over acknowledging our late grandparents in our wedding ceremony. I wanted to say something special just about mine because I was particularly close to them, but we couldn't figure out a way of doing it without seeming disrespectful to AA's parents and grandparents. I had a really good sooky sob over that. Of course now, with a clear head, I've realised alternatives and we'll make mention of them in speeches at the reception instead.
Second was over receiving a text from a close cousin who isn't able to make the wedding at all now and will be overseas for work. It's a close cousin I grew up with. I was surprised at my reaction - said cousin had recently been driving me a little nuts coz they just couldn't commit to saying if they were bringing a plus one with them or not. They wouldn't say 'no' even though they obviously didn't have a significant other to bring already. But, I grew up with this cousin, I know what they're like, it just wouldn't have occurred to them that this would be rude or the implications it would have on something like wedding planning. Anyway, RSVP deadline was Feb 1 so I sent them an email last week saying - 'hey, look we really need to know if you're bringing someone or not. I know it seems like a small details but it's one that a bunch of other things rely on so please let us know by xxday otherwise we'll just assume you're not bringing anyone'. And now they're not coming at all! I guess it was when I realised that this potentially means that my two closest cousins, who I grew up with like siblings, both won't be at the wedding. And this is news that has only come up recently - but I guess it's only coming up now coz now's the time we're locking in numbers and really need to know. Still... it's sad. But I guess there's not much that can be done!
Anyway, we spent a good solid weekend getting back to feeling like we're on top of things or at least are across what still needs to be done. I realised I could apply my work skills and what I needed was WORKSHEETS! A wedding's just a rather elaborate gig right?
So the wedding steamroller is back on track woot! woot! Heading up to the reception venue tomorrow night to go over details and lock more down and then back for our 3rd session of pre-marital counselling (more on this later) on Saturday arvo, followed by a free intro to meditation class at the local Buddhist temple. I need it!
